“Nashville” Season 6 Premiere: Juliette Barnes is Definitely Going to Join a Cult

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We pick up the sixth and final season of “Nashville, where we left off– Rayna, unfortunately, is still very much dead and she seems to have moved to Los Angeles, where she’s working as a 9-1-1 dispatcher. Definitely not the path most country music singers take after the music fades, but whatever makes Rayna happy makes us happy.

Oh, that’s right. Rayna isn’t real.

So, okay, yes, Rayna is still dead, Juliette is still unmistakably sad, Deacon is trying to run a business and maybe Gunnar and Scarlett are broken up.

When we officially meet up with Deacon, Maddie and Daphne they are happily and hastily trying to take a holiday photo, while also discussing spending New Year’s Eve together because, you know– Rayna is dead. During the middle of this, Maddie learns that she has been invited to perform at the Hits and Hunger benefit with Justin Bieber, Sia, Bruno Mars and a fake singer that Daphne is super pumped about. Even though this is definitely a career thing and shouldn’t be turned down, Deacon says Maddie can’t go without a chaperone. Luckily, cool cousin Scarlett agrees to go.

As Juliette prepares to tour for the first time in 2 years, she’s met on stage by some hecklers that paid to attend a show just to hold up mean signs and tell JB to “go home.” Of course, she responds directly to fans and ultimately decides it’s time for her and Avery to get away without the baby. Naturally, they head to Asheville, where she has sleeping problems and meets a thoughtful, handsome stranger who speaks deeply about authenticity.

After leaving the stranger, Juliette sees the man she met on TV during a segment on Church of Coherent Philosophy. It doesn’t take long for everyone to be reminded– Juliette Barnes cannot have nice things and she is definitely going to join a cult.

I’m all for Juliette figuring out her journey, her path, giving up control or whatever, but not like this.

While in LA, Maddie gets swept up with ol’ Jonah Ford, who is a big fan of hers. Then, all this other blah, blah happens and he stands her up the next morning, but conveniently shows up with an offer to fly home in a private jet just in time. And they’re probably in love now.

Meanwhile, back in Nashville, Gunnar has terrible bleach blonde hair and he’s getting performance tips from Will, who is really good at shaking his ass. But, mostly the BFFs are just hanging out to discuss their broken hearts.

When it’s all said and done, Juliette has gone to the Church of Coherent Philosophy center and decides to try out a few techniques. This is definitely the “Nashville” version of Scientology and they need a celebrity. Deacon still isn’t ready to date, but he ends the episode happy because his girls all showed up to celebrate the new year with him.

Overall, this episode seemed to moved most of our beloveds along, but we’re headed in some seriously interesting directions.

“Nashville” airs on Thursdays, at 9l8c on CMT.