Wham!’s “Last Christmas” is one of the highest-selling Holiday singles of all-time, yet it’s kind of sad. The video is also very perplexing.
First, a look at the lyrics. Written by George Michael and originally released in 1984, this is the saddest tale of gift-giving ever.
Last Christmas, the narrator gave someone his heart, but not even a day later, she gave it away. That is the quickest turnaround of all-time. Like, that is get up at 6 a.m. on December 26 and wait on Walmart to open the doors to return your presents early.
As we move on throughout the song, we learn that the narrator has not moved on and he’s still pining away for this former flame. He writes a note, is still in love and knows he would fall for the same old tricks again, if given the opportunity.
By the end of the song it’s really bad– these two are in the same room together, but the scorned narrator is not getting anywhere near his former flame because of “your soul of ice.” What a way to describe someone. Imagine you didn’t realize the narrator gave away his heart last Christmas and you thought he was just talking about a sweater or something. Still hurts.
I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away.
To save me from tears
I’ll give it to someone special.
Once bitten and twice shy
I keep my distance
But you still catch my eye.
Tell me, baby,
Do you recognize me?
It’s been a year,
It doesn’t surprise me
I wrapped it up and sent it
With a note saying, “I love you,”
I meant it
Now I know what a fool I’ve been.
But if you kissed me now
I know you’d fool me again.
Oh, oh, baby.
A crowded room,
Friends with tired eyes.
I’m hiding from you
And your soul of ice.
My god I thought you were someone to rely on.
Me? I guess I was a shoulder to cry on.
A face on a lover with a fire in his heart.
A man under cover but you tore me apart, ooh-hoo.
Now I’ve found a real love, you’ll never fool me again.
The video follows the narrator and his group of friends enjoying a ski vacation over the holidays. His former boo is there– along with a host of people who love waving. Like, love waving.
As the friends settle in and enjoy the holiday, the narrator takes on a bit of a stalker-ish role as he can’t do anything but watch his former lover out in the field, inside the house, and while at dinner. He even longingly stares at the the broach the new man is wearing.
Finally, the two former flames enjoy a romp in the snow before spending time together in front of the fire– with the broach. And then, they all walk home together?
And that’s that.