10 Things That Don’t Make a Man a Gentleman


The “gentleman” persona is holistic. There is something deeper than being a gentleman than the clothes you wear or the car you drive. Being a gentleman originates from a strong inner character. A gentleman is honest, has integrity, and has a strong acceptance of himself. There is no need to put on an act — for a gentleman does not live in shame. His motions are tried and true. So don’t believe if you do one thing, it makes you a gentleman.

Here are 10 things that don’t necessarily make someone a gentleman:

1. A classy car

Who cares if you drive a Ford Fiesta or a Toyota Prius? Today’s gentleman is not concerned with the drives.

2. Opening doors

Opening doors is great. But you’re no gentleman if you only open doors for certain people and close them on everyone else. It’s not only rude, it’s tacky.

3. A college degree

A gentleman has no need to toss his pedigree around for everyone to see. He knows you’ll discover his intelligence in conversation. Information is everywhere. How he uses it will make him wise.

4. Walking a woman to her door

You should walk a woman to her door because you care for her safety, not because you want to be invited inside.

5. A signature drink

A signature drink will not make you a gentleman. A gentleman with a strong inner confidence will be just as comfortable drinking a cosmopolitan with a pink umbrella as he would be drinking bourbon on the rocks.

6. A well-fitted suit

It’s not what you wear. It’s not how you wear it. A gentleman does not find his identity in his clothes or other materialistic possessions.

7. Going to church

If you’re judging the flaws in others and not paying attention to your own, you are no gentleman.

8. Volunteering

Simply volunteering for a cause does not make you a gentleman. You should volunteer because you want to, not because you have to. A true gentleman gives his time and energy to those in need and expects nothing in return.

9. Taking her to a nice restaurant

A true gentleman is wise in his financial affairs. If your finances are not in order, and you’re spending your savings trying to impress her, you’re missing the bigger picture.

10. Being in shape

You do not need good looks or a great body to be a gentleman. A gentleman is just as strong within with character and integrity as any looks or muscles can provide.

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